Register of Absolutions

Fol.	Particulars	Severity	Fee
S-0357	Wore the rival jersey to dinner with the in-laws		0.99 USD

The soup was passed in silence.

Arrived at a family table in the colors of the other side. The record notes the gravy was cold by the time anyone spoke.

Why 0.99 USD? This rate reflects emotional cleanup costs, repeat offense potential, and the administrative burden of issuing a very handsome absolution.

• Uniquely numbered certificate (landscape PDF)
• Entry in your Sinventory, synced across all devices
• Re-download forever
• Optional share-card with your name + cert ID for social
• Forfeiture of any remaining moral high ground

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Filed under Family. Back to the catalog