Register of Absolutions

Fol.	Particulars	Severity	Fee
S-0191	Used your pet as a conversation exit strategy every single time		0.99 USD

"Oh I should actually get back, the dog..." The dog has been walked. The dog is asleep. The dog is being used as an alibi.

"Oh I should actually get back, the dog..." The dog has been walked. The dog is asleep. The dog is being used as an alibi.

Why 0.99 USD? This rate reflects emotional cleanup costs, repeat offense potential, and the administrative burden of issuing a very handsome absolution.

• Uniquely numbered certificate (landscape PDF)
• Entry in your Sinventory, synced across all devices
• Re-download forever
• Optional share-card with your name + cert ID for social
• Forfeiture of any remaining moral high ground

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Filed under Social. Back to the catalog